I Will Trust (Isaiah 12)

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“I Will Trust” is a song that I love and a song that always surprises me.  It came as a gift as I was working at writing (and rewriting ) what would come to be the song “Sing Hallehlujah”.  I was digging into various parts of Isaiah (8,9,60) for the song, and in the midst of reading I found myself reading Isaiah 12 and it seemed that the passage was already laid out as a song (and I think is indicated as a song in my NIV translation).  As sometimes happens after struggling with a song that will not write, “I Will Trust” came quite quickly and mostly formed.

“I Will Trust” is the sort of song that, in light of the above, feels like a gift rather than a product of labor.  It is also a song that has the precise message that I most often need to hear—”I will trust and not be afraid/for the Lord is my strength and my song”.  I long to live these words, while I also confess that I often do not trust, I am afraid, and I believe that I need to depend on what little strength I can summon to survive.  The words of Isaiah 12 and the words of this song are a reminder to me of God’s grace, of the call to live from an abundance mindset, trusting in God to provide.  This text reminds me, to quote Bono, that “the God I believe in isn't short of cash”.  Or, as my friend Eames reminds me “the universe is abundant, dude”.  I sing these words as affirmation, reminder, aspiration, and in the faith that “in that day” we will proclaim the goodness and faithfulness of God.

One aspect of the song that may seem discordant to listeners, particularly with the back drop of a lot of worship music, is that it contains acknowledgement of God’s anger.  This is part of the passage in Isaiah is very important to me precisely for the reason that it includes anger.  In my work as a therapist and in my life in intimate relationship with those I love I find it important to affirm that anger is an emotion, not a sin, and that feeling and expressing anger is not only allowed but perhaps critical for real relationship.  In western christianity anger has been labeled a sin and a virtuous life has often been portrayed as one without anger.  While I don’t think I was ever explicitly taught this I somehow have internalized it, and I feel like I am still learning to accept and express my own anger and to be open to hearing others express their anger.  This particular aspect of this song and this passage and Isaiah stuck out to one of the musicians we were recording with as discordant with what worship music should be, and I hope that it will do the same to some listeners and create space for thought and perhaps more openness to realize and acknowledge that real relationship is a place where all of our emotions can be expressed.



I Will Trust

I will praise you O Lord
Though you were angry with me
For Your anger has turned away
You have comforted me
you have brought me relief 
surely you are my God, my salvation

I will trust and not be afraid
I will trust and not be afraid
For the Lord is my strength and my song   

You will draw with joy
From redemptions well
And in that day you will proclaim
Give your praise to the Lord
Shout aloud and sing for joy
for great is He the Holy One of Israel! 

I will trust and not be afraid
I will trust and not be afraid
For the Lord is my strength and my song  

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WAKE UP! Advent 1, 2023